​Ideation

Telugu Original: Ooha by Skybaba

Tr. By: RS Krishna Moorthy and NS Murty

***

‘Ideation’ did not stop at that… she went on drawing an ideal image out of her ideas according to her likes and dislikes, filling up the blanks whenever there was discontent. There were as many contours as she drew on the spur of the moment. Whenever she wanted, or could find time, she placed the image in front of her, studied for blemishes, and went on correcting them till she was fully satisfied.

Consequently, the image was bestowed with teasing eyes, charming face, enticing smile, carefree gait, and a comely pose…  and Ideation started walking hand in hand with it.

Occasionally, and whenever she got upset with this evil world, Ideation preferred to be lonely, idling her time with her ideal ‘image’. Afterall, it was an image! How could an image refrain her from exercising ​her will? So, Ideation used to empty her grievances before the image. She often complained, ‘that the world is a sadist, and it unilaterally decides what is right and what is wrong; it forbids doing certain things, builds walls and erects fences about people,’ etc. She also lamented before the image how she was constrained to reconcile to things against her will.

This went on and years rolled by.

Suddenly, it struck Ideation that the shades of life were missing in her image. She was shattered and devastated. Soon, she went in search of life. Poor Ideation, she did not encounter it face to face. Life, however, went on asserting its presence through its multiple manifestations. Ideation ran after Life following those clues. She was desperate to trace Life to catch hold of it. She made any number of trials. Enquired all and sundry. And enquired all puppets that were once endued with Life. No use. She could not find its whereabouts. No puppet could lead her to Life. Maybe they were jealous of introducing Life to Ideation. But the extensive writings of Life appearing in print used to unsettle Ideation. The writings reflected exactly those traits Ideation had dreamed her image to possess. It was as if those writings were meant for her and addressed only to her. Ideation could not suffer anymore.

With a firmer resolve she searched the whole world for the clues about Life and finally could secure a small lead. It was a faint lead. So what! She could at least converse directly with Life and that was enough for her. As a maiden attempt, she tweaked Life on its wavelength. It gave her goosebumps all over. She was overwhelmed with a feeling of being enveloped by some mighty electro-magnetic force. She recovered and greeted Life pleasantly.

Wow! The very first response from Life was nothing short of a mesmerizing charm. Ideation felt that she was totally captivated by Life. Regaining her composure, she started conversing with life. The uninhibited laughter of Life wafted Ideation to the crest of a sky-high wave. There was some inexplicable appeal in Life’s expression. And a feeling of age-old familiarity.

Ideation was beside herself. The cool, effulgent words, the torrent of laughter resembling a cataract, that eloquence that could clearly express every feeling, and the uncompromising self-assured dignity and the courage of Life overwhelmed her. With that impressive array of traits she could no longer imagine further, ideation ran up to her image. She started breathing life into her covetous image as she conversed and went on correcting blemishes one after the other.

Lo! The image started speaking to her now.

The image started talking through that invisible lead.

The image she created— an image she molded according to her will and pleasure— started conversing with her!!!

What a miracle!

Her image came to life!!

Enough. Her enduring search had come to fruition.

And getting acquainted with Life seemed the purpose of her life.

*

Ideation thus surrendered herself to Life and lost count of the time passed by under its spell. But how long could any pleasure, angst, or charm last?

The image started giving negative vibes.

She started to rebel.

“Am I a wad of wax to keep quiet?” she questioned.

“Don’t try to set and confine me in your frames,” she resisted.

“Don’t dream of decorating and showcasing me,” she cautioned.

“I am no longer the lifeless image of yester years devoid of responses to stimuli. I am a complete ‘being’ now bubbling with life and countless abilities,” she declared.

Ideation was aghast!

She thought the image she so covetously molded would be loyal to her once it came to life. Forget about loyalty, the image no longer obeyed her commands, and was not heeding her advice. This she could not digest.​ ​

Ideation emptied her grief before a friendly puppet, “Look! My image is not listening to me.”

“Did you use the colors in the right proportion?” asked the puppet.

“Of course. But she is not vulnerable to any color and bears no impressions.”

“Is it such a ball of butter?”

“To be fair to it- My image is as luminous as the Sun, as cool as the Moon, and as patient as the mother Earth!” Ideation lost herself under the spell of her own eloquent words.

“Then you ask Life directly why the image was not listening to you,” suggested the puppet.

Biding time for the right moment, Ideation asked Life the same.

“You claim that you infused me into your coveted image. Then, shouldn’t you be galloping behind her as briskly? That is beyond your ability, I know. Then at least, you follow her. But don’t try to clip her wings,” advised Life.

“No. I like my image. And like you even more, reflecting through it. I want you both,” said Ideation, seized with emotion.

“I have passed the realm of nebulous ideation to becoming a being. I am moving forward breaking all barriers. Unable to do that, you remain where you are and what you are… a mere ideation. You are showing withdrawal tendencies creating an image just to pass time. You are both timid and silly!” said Life.

Ideation grew angry but restrained herself. “Then what do you want me to do? I want to be like you,” she said.

“To be like me, you must outgrow yourself. That means, you must cross the limits of ideation. You must dissolve that imaginary image and beat down the barriers erected around you by the world. You should be on your own and be dynamic forever. Then, and only then, can you spread your fragrance around,” said Life without mincing words.

“I will attempt to do that. But before that, I was scared of losing your company. I want you. And want you desperately. Tell me how I could possess you. Please!” pleaded Ideation.

“To possess me there is no alternative but to come alive yourself. You should liberate yourself by dismantling the decorative bars erected around you with your consent. Only then shall I come within your reach,” announced Life. The stoic and dispassionate tone in her voice conjured Ideation.

She seriously introspected if she could do it. The more she introspected the more she saw the countless bars pegged around her. She grew sceptic. And apprehensive. A sudden burst of grief overwhelmed her as she realized her helplessness.

She wailed her heart out.

And it is wailing still.​​

The world was laughing under its sleeve.

And it continues to laugh!

*